Today I got up did some home finished one assignment. It felt great. I went to the salon today and achieved some services and got a ride there and back Glory be to the Most High. I was had company with my friend from back in the day. Noticeably they were with me almost 13hours in one day and said they were coming back we had breakfast together and late lunch-dinner. We watched television and played songs and sung together. Then, they slept I did home work and then I fixed some redskin potatoes; I fried them like French fries, they were great. My day was very amusing and I reflexed on last year around this time and I was with my friend then and it seem to be a difference in my friend. I continually hear my name begin sung daily now and I am wondering does this person love me. They say they hear in their sleep my name being sung. and did I sing while they were sleep I said no. However, I do believe that they did hear my name because of the way they acted when they woke up. I am in such awe right now I Love my friend and I don’t really know why.
Certainty…
Being able to be certain in making the right moves is a strategy all it self. I notice that when you take a stand against abuse from a person or entity your life, way of thinking change some will some wont I am one of those that did. I hope that it will be well worth it. For my life and all that I hold dear.
Making the right CHOICES…
I am so tired….
The Past, Present, and more Present…
I am continuously haunted by my past and I’ve often asked for help. Yet to no avail I have not the deliverance that I know I need. Today, I realized that there is only one way to face my demons and that is to give it up to the Most High. I suffer and have been suffering from a great deal. I have seen so much devastation and cruelty in many of my days and I become greatly depressed at some point, periodically . I would hope that my deliverance come soon so that I may live my life a better way in. I want to be free from all that is ills my mind and my heart. From the past and the continuing present.
The Notice…
So toady I received a texted from a woman at my job and she generally don’t texted me, however, I know that she was told to contact me and so I responded like I wasn’t aware of the side play. She asked me if I was sick and that she hadn’t heard from me and if I was still working for the company? Like I was going to answer that. I responded and said I wasn’t feeling good but I am getting better. She then said are you still working I haven’t seen you on the texted. Now, in reality she was really working for my supervisor to see if I would say something that would let them know that I’d quite. I know and they know that they are on something different and that they were really wrong for treating me like they have been and I have made it up in my mind that I really want to do something more with my time like go to school. There is nothing more than me doing what I need to do to better my life. And with that being said I will do what ever it takes to do what needs to be done to get good grades and great attendance. I realize that no one will look out for me like I will with the exception of my creator. I am just grateful that I have Him to look out for me instead of someone who I can not depend on. I have given a notice to the bad relationship whether it is work related or personal. It is a new year and I want to do something more and what I have been doing and that is my focus.
The wake up call….
So it has come to my attention that all was for nothing and that is just fine I was giving myself to a lost cause even thought I new it from the start. It is funny how when you start to do the right the thing the wrong things that you been doing show you just how unintelligent you were. Well, it is official I am moving on and upward and no longer fooling around with regular on to the spectacular. To whom it may concern; bye mister man and hello my King. I will enjoy waiting and praying for my true King to come!
Knowing When to Leave…
Today, I had about enough of my current situation with a few relationships that makes me feel unappreciated. I have made it up in my mind that I really need to focus on my education and my self discipline. I took proper measures to do what I thought was best for me today by making a move to go get myself situated for school next week. I left work went to the hospital and grabbed my books for school. I am getting my mind right for the new school year and reading my book on the Power of Habits. Which is such and eye opener. I am learning how to control certain habits and create new habits. I am beginning to enjoy changing and the challenges that I face making changes. I would say that when this first 90 days are in a want to be able to continue another 90 days as for now I am on day seven.
Learning with Improvement…
Today was very trying and yet a great achievement. I was on the city bus this morning, the first bus passed me, I didn’t get upset, but the second bus was totally late and the driver tried to tell me a lie yet I informed her with tacked that I have been riding the bus for two months and I am always on time till today she begin to argue her case; I told her its ok and that I called my job and told them I was going to be late. She then said to me I never seen you before. I in turn said; generally you leave the Central Station at 7:15, you left at 7:19 say replied “oh.” Later at my job, the manager that so called trained me was begin very condescending to me yet I didn’t feed off into it, he also had some choice words I about me and yet I still said nothing. Before I left the office I told him thank you. Soon after that I lost my phone and called the office to ask if someone would check to see if my phone was in the parking or in my co-workers car as well check my boss car. Well, they said they checked but I need to focus on getting me some money, he really meant get him some money. Well, I didn’t get to mad and that was a shock to me. I generally would really lose it, I stayed calm, well later I got call that someone found my phone in the parking lot like I knew it would be. My co-workers really didn’t look, I know because of the time that the phone was found. The miracle is that it was a owner of a staffing company that found it, I think it’s a sign to move on from my job and find other employment. Maybe I just might do that.
From the Mouths of Babes….
I was on the city bus today and saw a little boy and his mother get on the bus. I was in the front and they went to the back there were many people besides us. More teenagers then the a lot of us. Well half way to the Central Station the bus broke down and we then had to enter on another bus. Leaving all those who were on the bus first had to get off and enter the available bus first. Now I went straight to the back of the bus unknowing that I would do so. Now here comes the little boy and his mother, they went on to sit of front of me. I then saw the little boy look me up and down and said to me out of his five year old voice;”why are you sitting in two seats?” I look down and to my knowledge as well I was sitting in two seats. I then looked at the little boy and said; “your right young man I should take up two seats.” …his mother told him “don’t say that.” I replied to her and said ” no he is right I should not take up space only take what I need.
That was such a great lesson for myself today. A child by the name of Amadeus, five years of age, brought to my attention that I was taking something that I didn’t need. That I was in default and needed to correct my choice. I will say that not only did he do it smoothly but he paid attention to my actions and called me out on the choice I had made. Bad habits and begin mindful of others is all apart of Discipline and to that young man I am grateful. We can all learn from each other if we be open to correction that we know is needed
The Power of Habit… Why I don’t succeed.
The Basal Ganglia, a small region of the brain situated at the base of the forebrain, it play an important role in the stored habits. I have so many bad habits and I often for many years tired to eradicate them but no avail I have not been very successful. I am learning my habitual loop, why I practice unhealthy habits, what triggers me to continue and how I can replace bad habits for good habits. I am writing a plan to make it plain. I need to continue to this journey for this rest of my natural born life. My goal is to become disciplined and successful in all my actions.
My sister called me and told me she saw a guy that she and previously been involved with and how he came up to her a give her the most passionate kiss they had ever experience in their passed relationship. Well, the reason why she told me this is because she is in a new relationship with a fellow that she believe to be the one, she has informed me that she only want to be intimate with him only, and how the old guy brought a feeling so strong that it gave her a headache. I then told her, we together as sisters must stop all bad habits and partake in a cleansing process. She has agreed and so I now have a partner to share with, and assist me on reaching my goal.
THE ONE WORD CHALLANGE 